Last time we discussed how we are made in the divine image of God, but how that image has sadly been marred because of our sins and the sins against us. We don’t live from the image we were created in, but instead from an image others have created for us. Images that are false and distorted.
That damaged image I had of myself caused me to seek unhealthy people and positions. Having a faulty image of ourselves will cause us to make wrong decisions in our lives, because those decisions will be based on the evil others have done to us, instead of the truth Christ has declared about us.
If you don’t think you are good enough, you will get into relationships that degrade you…proving what you believe. If you don’t think you are capable of doing great things you will let opportunities pass you by.
This lack of significance and value in our lives, compounded by anxiety, convinces us that we must heal ourselves with our own devices. One of the ways we do this is by building walls to try to protect our wounded hearts. We don’t want to recall our pain or confront it, so we attempt to suppress it instead. It’s our strategy to disassociate ourselves from our pain.
The walls we construct come in all shapes and sizes and we may not even be aware that we’re fashioning them. We tend to gravitate toward things that numb us…such as drinking, drugs, sex, food, or isolation, over obsession with service, careers, or education, a controlling nature, anger or people pleasing, etc.
The problem with walls is that we’re trying to protect ourselves from lies others have told us, by hiding behind lies WE have constructed. The walls we build are lies too and they are a dangerous place to hide. We create them to feel safe and in control, but in reality they are leading us into a deeper deception and disguising the truth from us with an artificial healing.
My Personal Walls
I know these devices all to well. I was too fearful and prideful to get help in my abusive marriage. I was a Christian home-schooled mom and wife and our whole family went to church every Sunday and were very involved. I thought I had to have it all together… what would others think if they knew the truth? So for over 20 years I hid and pretended, living in these walls of isolation and silence hoping no one would find out. I thought building these walls would protect me, but they didn’t, they obstructed the truth from me instead and stopped healing from taking place. What I didn’t know then is that what is hidden cannot be healed. I had to come forth with my pain and suffering, as hard as that was, and relinquish it all to Christ.
You can read the rest of my story in my books, A Womans Guide to Worth and A Rag Doll’s Heart. It has taken me along time to understand my significance in Christ…in fact I’m still learning it. But that is why I write…to hopefully guide others to healing in Christ.
I know that some of you don’t have a story like mine, but you have your own story of suffering. Perhaps you live life going through the motions, building those walls of psuedo protection and secluding yourself mentally, emotionally, or even physically from others… creating your own delusions.
Come Out of Hiding
This is not what Christ desires for you…this is not what he died for…for you to live in misery and hopelessness. We must come out of hiding and awaken from the deception that we can heal ourselves or that we have that certain strategy that will make everything better…. because we don’t.
I pray you stop hiding behind your story and trust Christ to help you out of it. His mercy and grace is endless and his love like no other. Begin surrendering it to Him and praying daily for his mercy and grace to flood your soul. Talk to someone about what you are going through, we cant do this alone, we need othres. I hope you come back too, for more encouragement as we continue on this topic.